Depression
Something so much more than I can possibly take;

Some kind of darkness I can't defeat.

Words alone can't describe this Nightmare.

Torment more than torment;

darkness more than darkness.

An apex horror of flashing fangs; of moving shadows.

 

Words won't ever be enough to describe this Nightmare.

Beyond any language of man to describe;
But might be described as, 

something so foul it defies all laws of science and reason.

A faceless thing that torments me in the night.

My life has become this Nightmare.

I always wished there was more time to say, 

how much I loved you before you passed away, 

But even now that we are apart, I carry you always in my heart. 

Through giving me life you gave me the world. You watched as the petals of my life unfurled. 

Your kindness and love gave me strength through the years, 

To fight all my battles and face all my fears. 

They tell me the spitting image of you that I am, Pride fills me when I remember the Man. 

Who gave me strength to be who i am. 

Who fills me with pride when in mirror i see, 

The greatest of men who lives on in me. 

That's why these tears I will cry no more, 

because you gave me the strength to walk out that door. 

And face the life that you gave to me, And from these chains of pain i will be free, 

Because I'm filled with your memory that lives on through me. 

Through you I find endless joy, To know that however short I was once your boy, 

From those memories Ill always show, 

The greatest of happiness a man could know. 

Even when i still had words to say, 

And disease and distance took you away. 

And even when you weren't with me you see, 

I look in the mirror and you smile at me. 

I look at that mirror and I know that its true, Dad the best part of me, 

is the part that is you.

A ray of light. 

A barren landscape. An island of rubble. 

She sits on the edge of the world, the bright red apple in her pale hands, 

a beacon of color among swirling grays and the pitch black of the abyss. 

 That and her eyes, fixated on their amber counterpart, full of knowledge. 

Deep pools of purest blue. 

Precariously sitting on the edge of a derelict park bench, before her lies an endless void, 

all that remained of what once was the Yarra river. 

During the creation of Apocollis the extreme pressure created a huge tectonic shift. 

The resulting earthquake cracked open the ground, resulting in this gaping maw. 

Like a blackened mouth come from the depths to swallow her. 

Pale hands release the crimson sphere, a sigh escaping her lips as the void swallows up the mote of color. The air is filled with the sound of rushing water where the Yarra falls eternally into the crevice. 

The darkness seems endless, the only evidence of movement, a slow rising fog. 

A cloud suddenly breaks free of its brethren, creating a hole in it's gray, dark world, letting through a pale wash of sunlight. 

Bathed in the faint glow of a single ray of light, her deep orbs lift toward the sky, the single disk of purest blue reflecting her own. The sunlight throws her pale face into view. Dark hair spills from her hooded jumper framing beautiful features, long jeans ending in dark boots dangle amiably over the drop. 

All too suddenly , the light disappears, other clouds move into place and shadows rule once again. The girl watches the clouds for some time, her pensive gaze almost willing them apart. With a sigh she shoulders the video camera seated next to her and abruptly stands up. Inches from the edge of the world she stands on the line between life and death. With a swift and practiced movement she pulls the camera from its bag and brings it to her eye. With a click she turns it on. Brilliant images fill her view. Flowers, tree's, birds, animals, before her is a garden of flora and fauna. Turning around she spies some children dressed in strange garb running through the trees, her heart aches. She opens her other eye which had been screwed shut until this point. Devastation, a gray world, broken and dead. She opens both of her blue orbs wide taking in the contrast, her heart filling with wonder. A blinking red light, she swallows a curse as the video camera shuts down. Left alone once again in a dead world, she takes one last gaze deep into the abyss. Wordlessly shouldering the camera, she heads off toward the collapsing architecture of what was once Flinders street station, debris crunching under her boots. 

Her name is Emma.

~my wings~ 

 you are the inferno,  that burns within me.  You are a snowfall of ethereal beauty.  

You are a truth beyond all we could know.  You are my song,  a love song sang slow.  look up at the sky, 

See my wings and you'll know,  The greatest part of all that's is me, Is my Fire. My Snow.  

David

David

Trapped amidst a nightmare;

a tangent plane of labyrinthine horrors.

 A realm that dweleth far beyond beyond all known dimensions of human pain and fear.

A multi-dimensional complexity in the form of true and twisted nightmare.

David hears a voice;

a whisper of a whisper...

“David”

The pealing tone of the voice,
~somehow familiar~
As though you had heard that gentle tone
 somewhere amid your dreams...

chases away the clinging shadows that plague the boys mind like a gale through fog.

And David’s mind and soul…

Are lifted away

**************

Darkness.

As it always has been: 

that pallet of creation;
that landscape in waiting;

that midnight larvae of life from which cometh all things 
since the beginning of time itself

From yonder twilight an ethereal vibration.

More than music;

a connection to the soul that fill's the world about you with 
sound that wasn’t  sound.

song that wasn’t song.

The Dust; The eternal

The true and untainted essence of life itself.

And in that moment:

A glow.

A harmonious luminescence.

Emanating from whence the sound that wasn’t cometh.

And from within that void;

where from dark world grew light and wonders beyond human comprehension.

Came the boy, David,

In a breath of fire and life and beauty untold; 

aglow in that dreamy light of newborn world.

The child raised his hands.

And within that moment.

A moment where the entire fabric of the world and felt like it would shatter itself apart from the beauty of it all.

'Life.'

A burst of exotic flowers, danced into being;

 Fiery hue burning brightly against the abyss

it was as though the whole world was catching fire,

and wherever David walked, the flowers would grow.

And from those fiery blossoms. 

~a world came into being~
 The boy walked.

And life.

 the world of his imagining flowed into tangible form.

Upon an ethereal breeze,

flowers took to the skies where they burst into thunder clouds tinged with a blue and green radiance, birthing droplets of blue fire that glowed brilliantly in the dusky twilight as they rained upon the new world.

Great trees stretched toward their heavenly plane; mountainous in size,

alive with lichen, vines and moss

some with mushrooms and fungi expanding out like organic platforms miles wide.

The blue-fire rain soared to meet the newborn flora below where it was absorbed as nutrients.

David held out a hand and caught a droplet on his finger. It was surprisingly cool. The drop appeared to regard the boy for a moment before leaping to the ground to join its brethren.

And so the boy wandered the world of his creation.

*************

Lifting an arm;

David gently caressed the bulbous flower of a silvery climbing vine,

the golden growth bursting open into a fiery Auburn and copper rose that glowed with an inner light.

The chain reaction danced along the vine lifting and twisting up and away from the cliff wall it had latched upon as the glowing roses reached toward the fiery rain.

And there she was; revealed by the living curtain.

Beneath the eaves of the climbing vines was the most beautiful young girl David had ever seen.

They stared at one another for a moment;

David almost in shock.

She held out a pale,

delicate hand to him.

He took it.

And then they flew.

*********

We soar the skies above our new world.

I feel in my heart, a feeling I only just realized I had lost.

It comes back to me now,

a long lost childhood friend.

A pale delicate hand takes hold of mine and the feeling fills me

and I realize what it is.

That feeling of wonder: That child’s belief in infinite possibility.

I feel it rise in my chest and suddenly I’m laughing out loud.

Whooping and cheering as we spiral through the clouds hand in hand.

She laughs too and it is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard;

indescribable as a sound it felt more like the first time you see snow or the ocean;

that intangible feeling of beauty and wonder.

We fly low following the river,

dipping and darting; our wings caress the surface of the fiery water,

beautiful aquatic creatures chasing the tapestry of ripples our passage leaves.

Soon we're speeding through the trees, dodging and weaving together like a single mind formed just in that fleeting moment.

We clear the treetops,

racing up the side of our mountain, dodging crags and waterfalls.

And there it is

Shimmering white stone inlaid with blue gems that twinkle in the light like Azure diamonds falling upon a snowy field; two albino dragons circle the highest parapet.

She laughs again and my heart dances in my throat;

I can’t help but laugh too for no other reason than it feels good to laugh with her.

We soar through the diamond gates and into the throne room.

 gracefully folding her snowy white wings behind her, she daintily takes a seat upon the throne, draping them around herself like a soft, downy cloak about her sparkling blue dress.

She is the most beautiful thing I have ever known.

Pale snowy white skin, beautiful blue eyes,

crimson lips and radiant golden hair framed by pure white wings.

I find myself kneeling before her; folding my own wings of darkest ebon.

I tap my right arm to my chest.

 “Princess.”

“Rise and come here,” Her voice is like a ray of sunlight. I move to her side. Entranced.

She takes my face in soft white hands and looks deep into my eyes.

“Do you, David, swear to protect me, with all that you were, that you are, that you will ever be?”

I stare enraptured by her sky-blue orbs, “I swear.”

“Then; 

our fates are one.”

I feel something pulse between us, I look down.

She lifts my gaze back to hers.

‘Then save us,” 

She begins to cry.

“Please David, Save us all”

suddenly she's kissing me, 

softly but with passion.

I taste tears as she grabs the back of my head and our kiss deepens.

Then all too soon she’s pushing me gently away.

And with that push I feel myself moving back with great speed,

back toward my world.

A few tears escape me.

As I fly back, 

back to the world.

Where I know she'll be forgotten…

**********

An alarm.

Analog digits flash 8am.

The blaring sound coaxes a disgruntled moan followed by a hand. 
The hand reaches out in several failed attempts for the clock before finally knocking it off the bedside where it warbles into an eventual halt.

The figure rolls out from under the blankets.
Attempting to utilize the least amount of effort as humanly possible in the process,

David drops his sloth-riddled legs over the edge of his bed and sits there for a moment,

trying to remember the dream he’d just had.

It’d felt so real.

He’d been flying and there was this girl…

The details where slipping away even as he grasped at them.

But he could remember this blissful feeling of pure happiness.

He tried to hold onto that too until, it too, 
slipped away leaving him feeling cold and empty.

Just another dream

he thought as he drove it from his mind.

The boy musters his will and in a herculean effort

lifts his lethargic form into something that was almost prone but not quite,

and zombie-shuffles to his computer.

Logging into his email the boy rubs the sleep from his eyes as he waits the load.

Wet.

Tears?

Was I crying?

One unread email; 

David opens it.

A picture of a beautiful girl is attached.

She’s crying.

Below the image,

a caption. It read:

Save us David!

Save us all!

 *********

Happy first one thousand views!

I just reached a thousand views! thank you everyone whose been following my work!

The staff here are so nice and happy.

I wish I could get my happy back.

I saw a lady today with advanced symptoms.

Poor thing had to be dressed by her daughter and walked like she didn't know where she was.

Sorry if my writing has been getting worse.

It gets harder to type day by day...

One of the ladies from Huntingtons Victoria I met today told me they're going to start advertising my blog on their website!